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Saturday, March 6, 2010

You're Gonna Howl with Laughter at this New Bank Owned Key West Property

From Dale McDonald Collection showing a funeral march through Old town

I have written before that in a prior life I did commercial loan workouts for a couple of big national banks in Denver. Part of my job responsibilities included the sale of bank owned properties. I got pretty good at doing my job. I tried to get the last nickle out of every deal, but I knew that when I had a problem property I had to sell it and get rid of it. I only "fell in love" with a couple of properties that I refused to sell at give-away prices. One such property was a big two story house on the golf course in East Vail. We had lots of offers from greedy buyers that thought they would steal the place. They lost.

When I had a dog foreclosure, I got rid of it. Sometimes we had to fix the dog up and make it pretty enough to attract a new buyer. You must understand that all dogs are not ugly. Some look perfectly normal. But location and previous usage can make a once viable property a pretty difficult sale after a property has been foreclosed upon. One such property was a small house that had been converted into offices near City Park in East Denver. Nothing 0dd about the conversion except the neighboring property had become an abortion clinic which was being picketed all the time. Another time I took over a medical building in North Denver. That building had been used as a pill pushng clinic where the doc pushed diet pills and Valium. The building had creepy old medical devices and lots of pills stored in boxes in the basement. We could not sell the drugs and absolutely could not throw them out. I ultimately found another doctor to purchase the building and he took responsibility for disposing of the furniture, fixtures, equipment and drugs. Yet another time I took over a gun store filled with weapons and ammo. I have never fired a gun in my life and being in that place scarred me. I found a buyer with the proper license to take all of the inventory and we were out of the gun business in a hurry.

All of this leads up to a new Key West listing of another key west real estate company. The property in question is located at 325 Julia Street in the Bahama Village area of Key West.

The listing Realtor says

"Presently licensed for use as Evergreen Mortuary and Conch Conquering Lion Construction. Second story has one bedroom residential unit."

I started to howl when I read that line. But then I looked at the pics of the listing including the viewing parlor, the embalming room, and that special room with the big table saw, I doubled over in laughter. CLICK HERE to checkout the mls listing info.

325 Julia Street back in the day. Now Bank Owned!

The Parlor at 325 Julia Street

The Embalming Room I guess

The room with the table saw! I hope we never see this place on America's Most Wanted

A few weeks ago I was showing property near the Key West Cemetery. We were in my car driving on Windsor Lane where I intended to go south to my next appointment. I had to hold-up a bit as there was a funeral procession (march) making its way slowly down Windsor Lane toward the cemetery. (Just like the one in the black and white photo taken in Key West in 1934,) When we managed to reach Galveston Lane I took a sharp right and made my getaway.

We don't have that many funerals in Key West because Key West isn't all that big a town. I understand that there are few if any remaining unsold burial plots at the cemetery. I kinda fear being taken to anyplace else in Florida. You must have seen the horror stories about Florida cemeteries and bogus burials. It is comforting to know that people in Key West still have reverence for the recently departed. I mean that in all sincerity. But since there are not a lot of burials, it is nice to know one could use the none mortuary space for other uses such as construction.

The 2460 sq ft mixed use building at 325 Julia Street is offered at $489,000 or $199 per sq ft (50.25' x 79.33'). A couple of other funeral homes have been sold in Key West in the past few years. This could be a fun project for someone in need of Hmdr (Historic medium density residential) permissible zoning space.

I would be happy to show this property to serious buyers. I make light of the listing because of the incongruity of use between mortuary and construction office. But let's not waste someones time for a laugh. Please call me, Gary Thomas, 305-766-2642 to schedule a showing. I am a full time Realtor at Preferred Properties Coastal Realty, Inc.

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Key West, Florida, United States
I first read about Key West in a magazine called "After Dark" sometime in the mid 1970's. But it wasn't until March 1984 that I made my first visit to the island that would become my home. I had two weeks for a vacation and reserved a room at Colours Guesthouse (now Marrero's Guest House) for one week. I thought that if I didn't like Key West, I could always go back to Miami or Ft. Lauderdale for the rest of my trip. But after a couple of days in Key West, that was no longer a consideration. But when I wanted to extend my stay for the extra week I found there was no room at the inn. The guesthouse owner did find me a room at LaTeDa, the infamous guesthouse/restaurant. That's a story I'll write another day. But those two weeks in Key West gave me the realization that I had found Paradise. Key West has been my home since 1993 and my only regret is that it took me so long to get here. I am a full time Realtor at Preferred Properties CRI. Let me help you find your new home or business in Paradise. Living in Paradise is not a slogan, it's a way of life.