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Wednesday, November 8, 2017

The Case of the Gremlin Chasing Home Inspector


Three weeks ago I wrote a blog where I recounted my experiences as a law clerk in the Jefferson County Colorado court system while I was attending law school in the early 1970s. Judge Joseph P. Lewis was one of the judges I worked for. One day shortly after a criminal trial had begun, the judge gestured to me to approach the bench. When I got up there, the judge put his hand over the microphone and instructed me to call the Colorado Supreme Court to verify that the young attorney representing the defendant in the criminal proceeding was actually a lawyer. I will call that lawyer "Odd Bob".

I had never been asked to verify that any other lawyer was in fact licensed to practice law. This was a first! I made the call and learned Odd Bob was a licensed attorney. I went back inside the courtroom and told the judge Odd Bob was legit. The trial proceeded without anyone knowing the judge's concern about Odd Bob's competence. A short time later I told the story to two of my fellow law school classmates who clerked for other judges. I can't remember exactly how it came to pass, but each time Odd Bob appeared in court we all assembled to watch him.

Before I started to write today's blog, I went online and checked out Odd Bob's attorney status. The Colorado Supreme Court suspended him from practice in 1980. The court order stated "At no time during his representation of the (__name of client represented__) or during the pendency of this matter has Respondent (Odd Bob) recognized the errors enumerated above nor the inappropriateness of his action on behalf of his clients." In other words, Odd Bob was clueless as to why his professional conduct brought him before the Supreme Court for potential disciplinary action.

We all recognize the figure at the top of today's blog: he is Inspector Gadget.  I have this theory that after Odd Bob's license to practice law was suspended, he moved to Key West, changed his name to Inspector Gadget, and took a course to become a home inspector. He traded in his suit and briefcase for a uniform and an electronic gizmo which could theoretically detect gremlins not visible to the naked eye. I've watched Inspector Gadget point his gizmo all around a house seeking out gremlins hidden under Dade County Pine, behind drywall, or in an attic. I have never seen a house that Inspector Gadget inspected that did not have hidden gremlins.

A year or so after a customer of mine purchased a house a house, the customer called me to discuss his frustration over Inspector Gadget failure to notice a leak under the house. The customer was updating a bathroom when his plumber discovered a leak in sewer pipe suspended under the the joists.  The plumber stated the damage had been going on for a prolonged period of time and should have been readily observable during a normal home inspection. Inspector Gadget found gremlins but missed a leak. The home owner called Inspector Gadget to complain. Gadget apologized and refunded the price of the home inspection. I normally give my buyers a list of three or more reputable home inspectors to call to arrange for a home inspection. Inspector Gadget is purposefully not on that list - ever. Some buyers prefer to search for an inspector on their own. Ultimately the choice is that of the buyer. 

Wikipedia says this of Inspector Gadget: "Gadget is very powerful and loyal ..., but he is also very dim-witted, clueless, incompetent, oblivious, and gullible." The description reminds me of how the Colorado Supreme Court referred to Odd Bob's lack of awareness of his errors or inappropriateness of his conduct. Wearing a business suit and having a law license did not make Odd Bob a good attorney nor did wearing a uniform and possessing a gadget capable of finding gremlins make Inspector Gadget a competent home inspector.  

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